The Learning Process.

We’d be quite the assholes if we never learnt from our mistakes.

I’ve come to realise a few things throughout the years. In general, if I see a friend in need.. then well, I’d like to extend my hand out to help them.

Ever heard that little corny quote:

a friend in need is a friend indeed.

It sounds funny, and can be interpreted in two ways [source]:

1. If someone needs help, then they will become friendly in order to obtain it.

2. If someone helps you when you are in need, then they are a true friend.

Obviously I’d like to interpret it as the latter.

Problem is.. (something I need to work on obviously) that sometimes the hand extension is not always welcomed. Not so much not welcomed, just.. misunderstood or perhaps just not needed.

It’s almost second nature for me to help, but a lot times I don’t realise the negative implications to which my helping actions may present..

It’s a bit scary having to second guess helping someone – it should just be whether you want to help them or not shouldn’t it? Like, as someone who is helping a friend or anyone, they should almost be like a third person.

Yet, when I get too involved I seem to get myself into a bit of trouble. It’s.. I don’t know, discouraging sometimes, but I try not to let it affect me too much. I want to be a good friend, I do. I just need to realise where I’m messing things up.

When is it enough?

Misunderstanding is almost as bad as being accused. But that’s no excuses for the mistakes I made.

I genuinely messed up, I will apologise, because my intentions for helping someone is to well.. help them. That means any sort of action or whatever related to the problem area, is to try help it. If one method doesn’t seem to work, you’d try another right? I wouldn’t give up on a problem like that.

But once again, I managed to screw up. So I’m sorry. But it’s a learning process it is – you know who you are, and you know what my main goal in my life is.

So.. I’ll just take this as a lesson well learnt, and make sure I don’t make the same mistake again.

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2 thoughts on “The Learning Process.

  1. Sometimes it’s a bit sad. Being there for someone is well-intentioned on your side, but maybe the other side doesn’t want you to be there, or that your way of helping is not the way they want to be helped.

    Looking at the big picture helps… I guess try to understand the best way to help. But yea, this whole “how should I help someone” stumps me often too. I understand your pain =(

    • sukari89 says:

      Haha you’re right, but you know, I think it’s important that as a friend whose trying to help, that you’re able to keep in mind to yourself that helping was your pure intention and that if you did mess it up, you review it and fix it so you won’t do it wrong again.

      I mean the people you are trying to reach are having it hard already so they may just be more careful with themselves in general. But for me it’s always that no-go line I always seem to cross by accident..

      Need a mental eye check or something!

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