I still remember..
..the first day I attended UNSW as an officially enrolled student, the first place I went was the Library. It was a Monday and I did not have tutorials as it was the first week of semester. I remember sitting there and flipping through my MATH1311 yellow Algebra workbook and purple Calculus workbook.. trying to see what was in store for me this semester..
I remember realising the assumption this course had that all students would have taken 3U maths in highschool.. I was not one of them. I remember panicking and worrying when I first found out.
I remember busting my ass off during first year, often doubting myself and whether or not I should have selected this course.. always doubting but somehow always managing to stay above the danger lines.
This may be a post that’s a bit late in the making, but to be real honest, although I finished last Friday (12/11/2010) I haven’t really been “free”. As it’s 2:30AM now, I wish to punch some thoughts and reflections before I fall asleep!
Cannot believe it still, no more University (undergraduate anyway), wow. Shit is about to get real.
I know I have probably never mentioned this to my colleagues and friends in real life, though I know I have posted about it before..
If I could describe what my University experience has meant to me.. I’d say it’s been like my “pride”. However, I do not mean this in an arrogant way, nor am I implying it as such.
For those who know a bit more about me, at around mid-Year 11 (2nd last year in Highschool), it was always my goal to be granted a Business Information Technology Co-Op Scholarship @ UTS (I was unaware at the time UNSW had an offering). In a way this goal was fueled by 2 main factors:
- My desire to achieve something.
- My mother.
OK, let me explain, I suppose it could be the way I was brought up or just a mix/clash of mentalities between parent and child, but ever since Primary/Elementary I know my mum has always hoped that I would be able to achieve things like.. the OC (Opportunity Class) and Selective Schools. Both of which I could not, for awhile her way of thinking kind of got to me – “HSC is your last chance.” ever since then, it has always been in the back of my head, sometimes haunting. Why? I suppose rather than rebelling I’ve wanted to make her proud of me.
Our family faced great difficulties when I was in year 8, ever since then I’ve seen how hard mum has been working and supporting my brother and I, directly and indirectly.
Apart from making her proud – if I was to do well in the HSC and somewhat setup the foundations of a stable future I knew that perhaps even slightly.. I could remove some of her concerns and worries for me.
Being granted this opportunity for studying at UNSW with the Co-op program has been such a blessing. I have always been grateful for this opportunity from day one. Not only did it help myself with my own confidence and the feeling of achievement, I felt that it has matured me over the years as well as indirectly helping my mum out too.
I refuse to use the word Journey.
These last four years have definitely not been the smoothest, every year I tend to come across problems.. be it academically or personally etc.
Thinking back now there are definitely times during these four years I wish to forget. But all of these memories and past events have shaped how these four years have panned out. It’s hard to not want to go back and do things differently sometimes.. but I’ve noticed that keeping yourself busy really helps haha.
So glad everything turned out OK in the end.
Perhaps I am just paranoid. Maybe.
But what made this experience really memorable and enjoyable is all the friends I have made. I know it sounds soapy and whatnot, but there really isn’t any other way of saying it.
No one was kidding when introducing this program that “..you’ll make friendships that will last forever.” I don’t know about you, but I definitely believe that.
Even just reflecting back, myself around all of you guys in BIT/ISM during first year compared to the second year.. compared to the third.. compared to the fourth.
Recently, Sharjeel exclaimed, “Ben hasn’t changed, maybe just become more angry.” Well I’ll tell you what, it just means I’m more comfortable around you guys haha.
The friendships made have been really important and valuable to me because I never really enjoyed a proper “University life” but I know I have always had the accompaniment of you guys. Believe me, it’s really helped me get through these four years. Whether it’s small things like getting through/staying awake in lectures, raging/bitching during Industrial Trainings (mad props to James and Chris for the webChats!), getting through the rough times, and enjoying the great times.. every minute of it has been great.
“I will always remember..”
.. my INFS1602 lecture, which had an average of 6 people attending per lecture with an all time low of 2.
.. my MATH1311 lecturer, who had a pen thrown at him during a lecture and stormed out when no one owned up.
.. getting 21/40 for my ACCT1501 mid-sem exam.. oh the shock and panic I had from that.. (I finished ACCT1501 with a 52).
.. the hell COMP1911 and COMP1921 put me through.. I remember sitting next to Chris in one of the lectures and seeing him finish the Yahtzee assignment during the lecture and crying inside.
.. Yihong’s shenanigans e.g. “How do we tell if the circle is shaded in or not during the exam when there’s no colour?”
.. Christine’s rants and bitching!
.. “.. the WHOLE of SISTM is incompetent.” – Rowan, 2008.
.. Rowan’s disappearance from 2009 and returning in 2010.
.. fantom chat and mentions of Fanny.
.. Varun’s bad jokes and “quick questions, mate.”
.. Ben’s excellent speeling.
.. Michael “Mick” MacCarthy and “langer”.
.. and many.. many more, lots of great “LOL” memories :).
Now that I think about it, you guys have been a great mix! Lots of different hobbies to talk about to different people :P.
Please forgive the poor structure and English I used throughout this post but I’m going to wrap this up before I fall asleep!
A big thank you to all BIT/ISM ’07~’10 you’ve been great friends (and great group members too ;)). Thanks for all the fun times, memories, laughter and support throughout these four years!
To my Highschool friends and non-BIT/ISM friends made @ Uni (you all know who you are right?) – thank you for all the support and times when you’ve lent your ear(s) for my ranting/bitching/complaining/QQ’ing etc etc.. Thanks for always having the patience and time to put up with me!
I suppose mum would never read this and that’s OK too, but thank you mum for always being supportive no matter what I want to do with my life :).
I’ll keep it like this for now – if anything else comes to mind I shall edit this!
To all my friends who are already travelling and those about to – have a great trip and stay safe!
To all my friends who are not and stuck in Australia – let’s keep each other company :(.
To all who’ve read to here, nice work! Goodnight!
Ben’s right, I didn’t quite mention BITSA.. well in my four years I’ve been involved with BITSA 2 times, 1st year and 4th year, which is kind of weird, you’d think that if I stopped after 1st year.. that would be it lol.
To be honest, first year was kind of forced upon me, it’s not that I didn’t want to be the Arc Rep. nor did it mean that I didn’t enjoy it, just that in all honesty I thought we had to be at the AGM because it was part of the course/program – hey, I was nervous.
Interesting shit went down that year.
Thanks Martha for showing me the ropes.
Anyway, as mentioned, my experiences were a good one, because of this I wanted to give something back. That was a big reason as to why I joined BITSA exec in my final year.
It’s been great fun working with all you guys, spamming you guys, and getting pizzas for you guys lol.
Good fun 🙂 not stuff I imagined I would be doing with the me in 2007.