I just got home today from a 13 hour working day (a colleague went to watch a movie, came back and left earlier than me!) because of some issues occurring at work. Not complaining because I feel it’s part of my job and duty to do whatever I possibly can to make sure I deliver what has been promised.

But it frustrated me a bit because this particular piece I’m working on was so close to completion and then there was this minor hiccup.. We’ve done as much analysis as possible and think we’ve figured out what the issue is. That’s not the frustration; the frustration is actually from the inability for me to resolve it. Whether it’s because of my (lack of) expertise, limited access to systems at work, or resources / contacts..  just the feeling of helplessness.

It’s one of the feelings I hate especially when I know something is wrong and I even have an idea how to fix it. But I just can’t because of some other reason. It’s this feeling that really frustrates me especially since I’m so close!

Pretty much.

But it’s not just limited to work I suppose.

It’s really in general, like some times when someone I love or care about is in trouble I can only support them by listening to them if they ever need to rant. I won’t lie, some times it’s a bit tough because I obviously care about their well-being and I wish I could do more for them.

It’s not so different for work either because I just want to get the work done, tick that box, meet deadlines and “expectations” or promises even.

But what can I do about this? I’m trying my best to learn as fast as I can on the job because I’m relatively new. I just wish I could bring more to the table, some kind of expertise or knowledge that doesn’t require me to depend so much on other teams or third party support.

It’s always the small things.. the small issues that keep me up at night.

We’re so close. So close.. someone! Throw us a bone! 😦


3 thoughts on “Helplessness.

  1. Ben .. there is one thing you need to remember.
    You are not going to be an expert on everything .. and neither is anyone else.
    Anyone who says otherwise is lying!

    Not knowing everything – Its a reality, and can be overcome by proper expectation setting and leveraging help when needed.

    I know in this day an age, young professional like us are expected to do many generalist-type jobs with little information or ‘training’. We are also expected to do everything that others can’t or won’t, which is physically impossible.

    Moreover, I find that the older workforce also does not have the ‘expertise’ but is able to shelter under their higher positions or guise that they are not savvy with new technology etc. etc.
    About 50% of my job is to advise people who have worked in their industry over 20 years and still dont have a clue as to wwhat/why/when they need to perform their tasks.

    However, it is also up to you to manage expectations. There is no rush here (even if it seems like it) … It is unlikely that you will get promotions, raises etc. solely on the basis that you have completed an endless list of tasks (my experience – could be false haha)

    It’s hard but we have to be realistic and let managers etc know of that as well.
    Politely but firmly, you need to explain why certain things cannot be achieved in timeframes set out, or have run over time. Not saying you shouldn’t be responsible, but simply realistic and ‘convince’ others of this fact as well.

    Easier said than done, but its something I am trying to practice myself 🙂

    • sukari89 says:

      Thanks for the kind words and advice! Yeah I get it and I know where you’re coming from. A lot of people have told me similar things as well.

      I suppose it’s just always been in my nature but then again, that’s a learning itself right? Knowing to manage expectations and do what I can to the best of my abilities.

      But I know personally this doesn’t come from career progression drivers – I just want to deliver on what was promised within the promised timelines. But yeah, I know I’ll get there. I know that when I do I’ll look back and realise it wasn’t such a big deal.

      It’s just WHEN it happepns it really occupies my mind!

      • Don’t worry too much about any of it…
        if there is a silver lining to any of this – at least you will become an expert by perseverance.

        Just remember to relax as well.
        This will give you confidence – helps in both solving further problems and also makes you happier 🙂

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